Being a FTM was an amazing experience, literally the best year of my life. Pregnancy was joyful, no horror stories about morning sickness or being miserable. I still was able to workout, do Yoga daily and was gorgeous. Labor was a mere 4 hours and a breeze and I was taking selfies hours later.
“Bam Bam” was always one step above his scheduled milestone, held his head at 2 weeks, sat up at 3 months, started crawling at 5 months, started walking at 10, breastfed until he was 14 months and started using the potty at 15 months.
Needless to say, the 1st year was a good year, but then my mommy clock wanted him to have a close sibling. 2 miscarriages later and my rainbow baby was growing fast. Compared to my experience with Bam Bam, this pregnancy has sent me on an emotional roller coaster with a park full of health concerns. At 14 weeks, I was told to take it easy and cut back my hours at work, at 24 weeks, I was placed on modified bed rest and at 28 weeks, I will more than likely be admitted to continue my bed rest at the hospital. Expecting my little girl has not been fun, but she’s already bossy and making me abide to her rules so I’m sure she’ll have her daddy and I wrapped around her little fingers in no time.
As the time grows near and I prepare for “Pebble’s” arrival, I suddenly began to have subtle anxiety attacks. Bam Bam is becoming more independent every day and while its great, I miss him being an infant and him rushing into conquering milestone by milestone before I got a chance to enjoy being a first time mom. Now within weeks, I’ll be expecting another little one, that more than likely we’ll rob me on her infancy too.
You see, The Captain and I are very outgoing and energetic people. We find it very hard to sit still and focus on one thing. We love conquering new tasks and overcoming new obstacles. So me expecting to have calm and chilled children I guess is reaching for the stars a bit. But still, I want to just wrap Bam Bam up in a swaddle blanket, while he tries to put his own shoes on and brushes his teeth.
So needless to say, I’m a bit anxious, although excited but full of fear, to have two children under the age of 2. I’m looking forward to the bickering, cries and whatever kind of horror stories they want to cast me in.